‘Teach not thy lip such scorn, for it was made for kissing lady, not for such contempt’ – the Shakespearean richness in flattery is indelibly etched in Richard’s eager pursuit of Lady Anne. If literary license allowed the borrowing of these words, though in the divergent backdrop of Kolkata’s viral kiss at a metro station, the Bard of Avon would seem even more germane to the times we are living in. The social media was of late cacophonic with contrasting opinions on the self-absorbed couple who were surreptitiously recorded indulging in public display of affection (PDA) throwing caution to the wind. As the City of Joy warms up to embrace winter, are we resorting to a foggy judgmental era or are we mindlessly justifying brazenness of expression?
Kisses have denoted moments in history and in life.
When the world is fraught with loveless existences, when wars are a commonality in modern discourses, why should a harmless kiss even unnerve anyone? This is a fundamental question we should be asking ourselves. Kisses have denoted moments in history and in life. If we leaf back to 1945, the iconic kiss at Times Square between an ecstatic sailor and a stranger clad in white defined the general euphoria when World War II was set to end. The upside-down and now iconic kiss of the Spider-Man films between Peter Parker and Mary Jane after his rescue act from a midtown mugging reverberated not only through the franchise but also through the entire gamut of filmmaking.
Kisses have historically been synonymous with jubilations. The netizens across the globe unfailingly celebrated when Swedish pole-vaulter Mondo Duplantis ran crazy to kiss his fiancée after setting world record at the Olympics. We have seen the Obamas often indulging in public displays of affection, be it the prestigious swearing-in which the world remained glued to or a regular basketball game. It is not only the rich and famous who are at it. If one goes for a walk around the city or even in suburbs, couples snuggling up while leaning against walls, window shopping at malls, laughing over coffee or watching movies is a usual sight.
Kissing is also an act of defiance in many parts of the world where oppression ruled over the years. PDA has always been a battleground for the youth to assert its freedom against sections of the population who are opposed to it and engage in needless vigilantism. The revolutionary photo of a couple on the streets of Iran kissing each other is no less than a social statement. Even in India, the ‘Kiss of Love’ campaign which germinated from collegegoers in Kochi finally spread to other states and intense protests were organised against moral policing. The rightness and wrongness debate may rage on, but the fact remains that affection is needed in this hour of fractured sensibilities. Even the doctrine of ‘obscenity’ is obscure. What is to be construed as obscene is purely subjective. Several judgements have ruled kissing in public is not an indecent act per se.
It can only be so if it ‘encourages depravity or annoys the public’. Justifiably every advice of ‘go, get a room’ will be countered with the counter argument of ‘if pissing in public is accepted, how is kissing in public frowned upon’. The dichotomy is even more underlined when the same cynical society is voraciously consuming web series verging on pornography on certain platforms. The cleavage is even more telling when a Dimri or a Hashmi, though 20 years apart, carve careers out of kissing onscreen, leaving aside their acting prowess. If kissing was a no-no act, who are those contributing to rising app ratings or creating celebrities out of 30-second clips in a 3-hour movie?
A section of urban populace blames it on the slow pace of generational evolution. Another section even draws a clear divide between urban and suburb or rural mindsets. These are perceptions fed on a flimsy understanding of how the human mind functions. Truth is laid bare on social media which has not only democratised access but has also provided a fair insight into collective psychology. The person who is reacting with love on Kiara-Siddharth or Jennifer Lopez-Ben Affleck kiss is cringing at the sight of strangers wrapped in love. The chasm is due to annoyance about in-your-face audacity or despair of unattainability or envy of time elapsed. At times, it is a potent mix of all three.
Kisses are stories. Compelling stories of wife and husband living apart by circumstance. Unfinished stories of couples separated at airports. Heartbreaking stories of fallen lives. Heart-warming stories of lives born.
A kiss is an effusive nozzle of human love. When manifestation is the season’s cool word, a kiss is its most primitive and sacred form. It lets our hearts race and bodies warm, creating rushes of excitement. It lets oxytocin flow free and cortisol dive deep. Kisses are tips of iceberg with unfathomable layers beneath. Kisses are stories. Compelling stories of wife and husband living apart by circumstance. Unfinished stories of couples separated at airports. Heartbreaking stories of fallen lives. Heart-warming stories of lives born. Unless it corrupts the dignity of love, let kiss flow downstream and a civilization of passion grow on its banks. Kissing is indeed intuitive. As is breathing.
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Aditya Gole
A corporate communication professional in power sector for 15 years who has his heart still nestled in English literature and journalism. Formerly with The Times of India and The Deccan Chronicle, his first love remains scribbling, reading books, and talking endlessly over cinema.
